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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27180104">Whimsical</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/nomsy/pseuds/nomsy'>nomsy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Princess Diaries - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Drinking, F/F, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Girls Kissing, Lana is a wee bit manipulative, Pining, Teen Romance, Teenagers, Underage Drinking, and selfish, because she's Lana, ignores Royal Wedding</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:49:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,018</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27180104</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/nomsy/pseuds/nomsy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Trisha's always known that eventually, she will marry a guy who will give her a condo, a holiday home, a baby and lots of diamond jewellery. </p><p>She's never minded that, but lately – well. Lately. Lana.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lana Weinberger/Trisha Hayes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Whimsical</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>So I didn't write anything for years and then I wrote this, which is so niche likely no one will ever read it. Also, Royal Wedding doesn't exist to me, because I'm too old. Oh well. Anyone who does read this, hope you enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="western">“Trish?” Lana slurs, staggering even though her arm’s slung around Trisha’s shoulders <em>and </em>Trisha’s steadying her with an arm around her waist.</p><p class="western">“Yeah?” Trisha asks, hopping along, looking for a taxi to get Lana into. Her feet are hurting in her heels, especially with Lana’s weight on her one side. Not that she’d ever tell Lana that – she’d get bitched at for implying Lana’s fat.</p><p class="western">“Don’t ever leave me, ‘kay?” Lana asks.</p><p class="western">“Of course not,” Trisha replies automatically.</p><p class="western">“’m, like, totally serious.”</p><p class="western">“So am I,” Trisha says.</p><p class="western">Walking is hard – she’s more than a little drunk herself. And it’s not like this is unusual – sake just makes them both go crazy, but they’ve shaken off the guys they picked up earlier tonight, and none of the damn taxis are stopping.</p><p class="western">“La,” she says, panting. “Do you wanna sit down for a sec while I call someone to pick us up?”</p><p class="western">“Not my parents,” Lana says.</p><p class="western">“No, not your parents. My brother.”</p><p class="western">Lana exhales in obvious relief. “Can I stay at your place tonight?”</p><p class="western">“Sure,” Trisha says.</p><p class="western">Here’s a secret: She loves Lana to death and back, but sometimes she’s a little resentful of her. She knows Lana is more popular, and thinks she’s the prettier one, and Lana would never ever half-carry her home if <em>Trisha</em> were that drunk.</p><p class="western">“You’re the best,” Lana says, pressing a sloppy, lip-glossed kiss to Trisha’s cheek.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">With Lana, a lot depends on her <em>whims</em>. Trisha’s always known this, as long as she’s known Lana herself.</p><p class="western">They’re annoying, these whims, because they’re usually there for Lana’s benefit and nobody else’s.</p><p class="western">This one, right now, is more annoying than usual.</p><p class="western">“What the hell, Lana?” Trisha hisses once Mia Thermopolis can’t hear them anymore. “That was our shopping trip, and you’re inviting <em>her</em>? You don’t even like her!”</p><p class="western">Lana shrugs. “Felt like it,” she says, so there’s no arguing.</p><p class="western">Trisha sighs and checks her eyeliner isn’t smudged one last time. “Fine,” she mutters.</p><p class="western">There’s nothing else she can do, anyway.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">It’s not like Trisha and Lana never fight – they do all the time. Their worst fights are usually over guys and of course Lana wins them all, as she wins every fight they ever have.</p><p class="western">Trisha sips her latte.</p><p class="western">“Stop whining, Trish,” Lana says, tossing her cup into a bin.</p><p class="western">“I’m not,” Trisha says even though she has been whining all day.</p><p class="western">“Shut up,” Lana sighs, rolling her eyes.</p><p class="western">It stings surprisingly badly.</p><p class="western">“I just don’t see why we have to do this with her.”</p><p class="western">“Come on. It’ll be fun. Did you see how scared she was when I invited her?”</p><p class="western">Trisha smiles grudgingly. “That was pretty funny,” she admits.</p><p class="western">Lana slips her arm through Trisha’s. “Let’s go,” she says.</p><p class="western">Trisha tosses her hair and reminds herself that Lana is worth dealing with her whims.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">Shopping with Mia isn't that bad, it's still shopping, after all. Even getting food after is alright.</p><p class="western">It's still a day out with Lana, which is always good. So good that she even attentively listens to Mia Thermopolis's romantic problems.</p><p class="western">Trisha and Lana exchange a look and a grin as Mia sighs about her ex. Typical. Some people take romance way too seriously. She and Lana, Trisha knows, have always been aware that, while it's nice to be in love, it's just as important to pick a guy you know will guarantee a condo and a holiday home and a cute baby and enough diamond jewellery to eventually distract people from the fact you're getting old.</p><p class="western">Trisha guesses sometimes, when she's really drunk and worried that no one loves her, that, for being with the right person, she could give up some of it. Probably the baby. Potentially the holiday home. Defintely not the diamonds, though.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">She does eventually grow to like Mia and Tina and the rest of them, more or less, and she’s been friendly with Shameeka for years now, so it’s not too bad.</p><p class="western">But Lana’s being all <em>different</em>. Not really in a way that's easy to grasp, but Trisha can still feel it. She doesn’t even know how.</p><p class="western">“Lana,” she says. “Can we do something tonight, just the two of us?”</p><p class="western">She misses having Lana to herself, hearing Lana whisper secrets just for her, throwing her glances at parties that don't mean anything to anyone else but mean the world to Trisha.</p><p class="western">Lana shrugs. “Sure,” she says. “But we do that all the time.”</p><p class="western"><em>Not as much as we used to</em>, Trisha thinks. “Let’s go out for dinner, okay?”</p><p class="western">Lana shrugs again. “Cool,” she says. “I’ll text you.”</p><p class="western">“Cool,” Trisha echoes weakly.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">This time, she’s the drunk one. And, just like she’s always known, Lana does not half-carry her down Broadway, looking for a taxi.</p><p class="western">“Trish,” she says, annoyed. “Can you, like, pull it together?”</p><p class="western">Trisha groans and throws up into the gutter.</p><p class="western">“You’re so stupid,” Lana says. “My date totally scrammed.”</p><p class="western">“You didn’t even know his name,” Trisha points out.</p><p class="western">“So?”</p><p class="western">Trisha rubs her eyes. She’s tired.</p><p class="western">“I was going to get you someone to have sex with tonight. You need to get laid,” Lana says. “You’ve been really weird lately.”</p><p class="western">“I’m fine,” Trisha says. Then, because she's so drunk she can't swallow down the words like she normally does. “You look so beautiful.”</p><p class="western">“Aww thanks,” Lana says, looking down at her phone. “So do you. Well, when you're not throwing up on the street.”</p><p class="western">“No,” Trisha says, because Lana isn't understanding her right. “You're so – Lana, you're -” Her mind is blank, she can't find the words for what she needs to say.</p><p class="western">“Trish,” Lana says, looking up from her phone. “What's going on with you?” The look in her eyes is enough to get Trisha to push the thoughts she was having back down.</p><p class="western">“Nothing. 'm fine,” she manages.</p><p class="western">“I know you,” Lana says, which is very true. “You can tell me, you know.”</p><p class="western">“No,” Trisha says. She can't. It'll never be an option to <em>tell</em>.</p><p class="western">Lana shrugs. “Suit yourself.”</p><p class="western">Trisha doesn’t remember how she got home.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">She’s so hungover the next day, she doesn’t move until late in the evening when Lana drops by.</p><p class="western">“So, spill,” Lana says, going through Trisha’s make-up. “What has been up with you?”</p><p class="western">“I – I don’t like Mia – Well, no. I like her, I guess. I don’t like you being besties with her.” Trisha crosses her arms. She’s very aware that she’s wearing sweatpants and an old, ratty shirt while Lana looks gorgeous as usual in her jeans, heels, and crop top.</p><p class="western">Lana laughs. “Trish,” she says, patting Trisha’s head. “I’ll always love you the most.”</p><p class="western">“I <em>know</em>,” Trisha says, and she does know, but it still hurts. “But you, like, do everything with her, and want to go shopping with her, and hang with her, and take an interest in her life and her relationships and it’s been like that since we went shopping with her that one time, just ‘cause of one of your whims.”</p><p class="western">“My <em>whims</em>?” Lana asks.</p><p class="western">Trisha shrugs. She isn’t sure she wanted to go that far, but now she’s said it.</p><p class="western">Lana looks at her intently. “If I did everything according to my whims, stuff would be very different.”</p><p class="western">Trisha isn’t sure what Lana means by ‘stuff’, but she can’t ask because Lana’s already stormed out.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">But in the long run, nothing will come between her and Lana. Trisha hopes that will never change. No matter the far future, some things always have been and still are theirs. Drawing up cheerleading routines. Crashing college parties. Sneaking more drinks than they should at cocktail parties at Lana's parents' place.</p><p class="western">“See her?” Lana whispers at one such party, her lips so close to Trisha's ear that she can feel Lana's breath ghosting across her skin. She shivers. She knows she shouldn't, but she does.</p><p class="western">“Who?” Trisha asks.</p><p class="western">Lana points her chin ever-so-slightly at one of her mother's friends.</p><p class="western">“Her husband's cheating on her,” Lana says, smirking, delighting in the gossip. “But she won't divorce him 'cause of the pre-nup. She'd lose <em>everything</em>.”</p><p class="western">“Right,” Trisha says.</p><p class="western">Condo. Holiday home. Baby. Diamond jewellery. Everything.</p><p class="western">Lana presses a kiss to her cheek. “Don't worry,” she says. “That's not gonna be us.”</p><p class="western">Trisha's breath catches for a moment, until Lana says. “We'll pick better guys.”</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">By the time they're in senior year, cheerleading practises and sleepovers and shopping trips have turned into exhilerating, terrifying, torturous rushes.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">One night, Trisha lies awake on one side of Lana's king-sized bed, heart beating loudly in the dark, listening to Lana's breathing and imagining her kisses.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">One night, Lana makes out with a girl at a party to get the guys' attention and Trisha goes home and sobs curled up on her bedroom floor, choking on her tears.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">One night, she locks herself in the bathroom of the bar they're in, staring at herself in the mirror, thinking <em>I can't anymore, I have to tell her right now</em>, gathering resolve that evaporates as soon as she slides back into their booth.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">One night, she wills herself to think nothing but <em>It'll pass </em>for hours.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">She needs distraction, badly, and it shows up in the unlikely form of Mia Thermopolis, whose birthday party is on a yacht, which is nice. Trisha is so happy about the invite that she almost feels a little sorry for being so jealous of Mia all the time. Almost.</p><p class="western">It’s pretty fun, actually – and downright hilarious when Mia answers JP’s prom-proposal with a ‘Well, we’ll see!’</p><p class="western">Trisha does feel a little bad for Mia, though, being put in the spotlight like that. Even though, being a princess, she should really be used to it.</p><p class="western">“That was gold,” Lana says, taking Trisha’s arm once the crowd has dispersed.</p><p class="western">“I know, right,” Trisha says.</p><p class="western">Lana drags her over to the dessert table.</p><p class="western">“I’m dieting,” Trisha protests.</p><p class="western">“Please,” Lana snorts. “Your diets only ever last, like, two days, anyway.”</p><p class="western">Trisha shrugs in agreement, takes a chocolate-covered strawberry and pops it in her mouth. “You’re taking that West Point guy to prom, aren’t you?” The West Point guy is not the right kind of guy – the <em>condo, holiday home, baby, diamonds</em> kind – but he's only for now, not forever.</p><p class="western">Lana nods. “He’s hot. Who’re you going with?”</p><p class="western">“Just some guy,” Trisha says, shrugging again. Lately, it's been harder than ever before to visualise the holiday home and all but impossible to imagine the condo. And she's not even going near the baby. (The diamond jewellery she can see alright, though. So everything's fine. She is still herself. Everything that defines who she thought she was isn't slipping away from her. <em>It'll pass</em>.)</p><p class="western">Lana laughs. “That’s all they all are, right?”</p><p class="western">“Right,” Trisha says, grinning as well. She takes a deep breath. “Perin and Ling Su are going together, aren’t they?”</p><p class="western">Lana shakes her head, then nods, then raises her eyebrows in confusion. “They found some guys for their parents’ sake, but, well, I guess they basically <em>are</em> going together. Why d’you care?”</p><p class="western">“Just thought of it,” Trisha lies. Actually, she’s been thinking about it a lot. One time, she even had the unspeakable thought – the one she had to drown in vodka until she couldn't think at all anymore. The one that went <em>You know girls can buy you diamond jewellery</em>.</p><p class="western">Lana smirks, takes Trisha’s wrist and drags her towards the other end of the yacht where there aren’t any people. “Come on, Trish, just get it over with,” she says.</p><p class="western">“What?” Trisha whispers, horrified. Lana can’t know. She can’t –</p><p class="western">“Kiss me, or whatever. Get it out of your system.”</p><p class="western">Trisha clamps a hand over Lana’s mouth. “Shhh,” she hisses.</p><p class="western">Lana pulls her hand away and kisses her.</p><p class="western">It’s better than kissing a guy, any guy. Better than kissing any girl, too, but Trisha wouldn't really now, not properly, she's only ever kissed girls the same way Lana has, to get guys' attention, sloppily at parties, not languidly and warmly, hidden in the dark with the sounds of the waves and the party blurring together around her.</p><p class="western">Lana pulls away. “There we go,” she says. “All fixed. Don’t want to spoil your prom after-party with Some Guy by being on your mind.”</p><p class="western">Trisha nods and forces a smile. Nothing’s fixed, and everything is spoiled, because it only now crashes down on her that she wanted this to happen, but not like this. If she's imagined it countless times, she's forced herself to drink it away countless times more – Lana cupping her face, and stroking back her hair, and kissing her, properly, because she wants to, not to get it out of the way or something.</p><p class="western">“All fixed,” Trisha says, voice raspy.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">It's Lana's idea to spy on Mia and her ex (yeah, right) having lunch and of course it's a disaster, and they end up spinning around in the boat, laughing so hard that they're bawling.</p><p class="western">“Oh my god,” Lana gasps. She reaches out to take Trisha's hands. “Promise me it will always be like this. Promise me, you have to.”</p><p class="western">It feels like running, like flying, like dancing. It's the best day Trisha's ever had. It's the best day anyone's ever had.</p><p class="western">“I promise,” she manages, still crying with laughter.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">At a party on senior skip day, she steals covert glances at Perin and Ling Su talking together, then tries to drown her jealousy in tequila. It doesn't work like it used to.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">Prom sucks. Some Guy is nice enough, but Trisha can’t help but watch Lana suck face with her West Point guy. He’s not even that good-looking.</p><p class="western">Okay, that’s a total lie. He’s extremely hot. Trisha scowls, but really, she feels like crying.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">In the morning, she takes a taxi to the Four Seasons. She needs to see Lana.</p><p class="western">Lana rubs her eyes and stares at Trisha. “Trish,” she says. “It’s eight a.m.”</p><p class="western">Trisha can hear the shower running where Lana’s West Point guy must be in the smaller bathroom.</p><p class="western">“Yeah, I know,” Trisha says. “I just – wanted to talk to you.”</p><p class="western">Lana narrows her eyes. “That guy from last night didn’t give you any problems, did he?” she asks.</p><p class="western">Trisha remembers one of Josh’s friends kissing her at a party when she hadn’t wanted to. Lana had destroyed him, been utterly ruthless even as a freshman, and he’d changed schools eventually.</p><p class="western">“No,” Trisha says. “No, it was fine.”</p><p class="western">She'd imagined Lana.</p><p class="western">Lana pulls her over to the bed and sits her down on the edge. Trisha momentarily feels anger well up insider her at the thought that West Point guy had slept there with Lana last night. She pushes the feeling away.</p><p class="western">“Trish,” Lana says. Her look is surprisingly sympathetic. “You’ve gotta stop this.”</p><p class="western">“I know, okay?” Trisha says. Then, more quietly, “I don’t want to go to Duke, and I don’t want you to go to Penn. I want everything to stay as it is now.”</p><p class="western">“No, you don’t,” Lana says. “You’ve got some stupid idea that something more could happen with us. But it can’t. That’s not done. We can't, okay? No matter how much we want to.” And <em>we</em>, she said <em>we</em>, is this not just Trisha, what does this mean -</p><p class="western">“Trish,” Lana says before Trisha can sort out her toughts. Then again, “We can't.” And Trisha knows in that moment they both see it, <em>really </em>see it for the first time – see their frat guy boyfriends turn into stockbroker husbands, their condos and holiday homes and babies and all of the nice, horrible things they've both always wanted. She doesn't think they know how to want anything <em>else</em>. She doesn't think anything's ever been so heavy, pushed her down until she can't breathe at the thought of it.</p><p class="western">“I know,” Trisha says again, even though now tears really are welling up in her eyes.</p><p class="western">“Don’t be a baby, alright?” Lana says. But she doesn't sound dismissive, like she used to when they were younger, like she still does to anyone who isn't Trisha. She just sounds quiet and sad and like she's struggling for breath just as much as Trisha is.</p><p class="western">“Of course not,” Trisha says. She leaves when she hears the shower stop running.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">For a few days, they act like nothing happened, no weird kiss, and no serious after-prom conversation. That’s fine by Trisha, totally. It’s better this way. No different to how it’s been all along.</p><p class="western"> </p><p class="western">But at graduation, suddenly it is different.</p><p class="western">Lana dances with her, which is nice. Lana is being suspiciously nice to everyone, anyway, and has been all day. Maybe it's Bubbles. Seeing her old pony again had made Lana so happy that Trisha hadn't even been able to get jealous of Mia for being the one to put that look on Lana's face.</p><p class="western">“Are you sentimental, or what?” Trisha asks, only half-joking, when they sit down for a drink.</p><p class="western">“I guess,” Lana says in her I’ve-given-this-a-lot-of-thought voice. She doesn’t use that voice too often. “You were right. It’ll suck, you being at Duke, me being at Penn.”</p><p class="western">“Oh,” Trisha says.</p><p class="western">“We have to spend all our holidays together,” Lana says. She’s looking at Trisha's hands, like she can't make herself lock their eyes.</p><p class="western">“Won’t you want to spend them with your boyfriend?”</p><p class="western">“What boyfriend?”</p><p class="western">“I don’t know – just some guy.”</p><p class="western">Lana finally looks Trisha in the eyes “No,” she says. Then, still seriously: “I got you something.”</p><p class="western">Oh. “I didn't get you anything,” Trisha says, a little anxious. Should she have?</p><p class="western">“No, no,” Lana says, taking something out of her purse. “I just – here.” She pushes a little velvet box at Trisha. It's diamond earrings. Trisha can't breathe. “La-” she starts, when Lana leans in and kisses her.</p><p class="western">“What are you doing?” Trisha whispers, pulling away. People can see. This isn't <em>done</em>. Is it? Lana's grinning, like she always is when Trisha is hesitating over something they both know she'll eventually do, be it kissing, or drinking, or sex.</p><p class="western">Already Trisha is leaning in a little again. Lana’s grin turns into a smile. “Call it a whim,” she says.</p><p class="western">Maybe, Trisha thinks as they kiss again, Lana’s whims aren’t the worst thing in the world.</p>
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